Just Life: A Drop

“It’s a drop in the bucket”

This is a phrase that is used in my house more often than not. Whenever I’m worked up about an exam, a boy, a bad haircut, or being in a bikini on national television, my dad always reminds me that each of these moments is just a “drop in the bucket”. A perfect sentiment that each day is simply one drop, you are never adding more than that to what will eventually become a full bucket of ups and downs, and well…a full life that will have been shaped by each and every day that you’ve lived. Leave it to Jeff Witte to turn major meltdowns into really good teaching lessons.

Well today marks one of my favorite drops in my collective bucket, my graduation from college. 1285 days ago, I arrived on the UW-Madison campus sick to my stomach with nerves, and totally clueless what my college years would bring. Little did I know! If you’ve followed my journey you know it’s been a really wild ride.

I began this journey as a poli-sci major, thinking I would go off to law school and that my high school modeling days were simply a really fun and glamorous phase. I ate pulled pork sandwiches from the dining hall like they were going out of style and became OBSESSED with the limited edition Gyro slice from Ian’s. I met and reconnected with some of the most amazing people this world has ever seen. And I learned that nobody really has it figured out, but college is your place to explore and take advantage of any opportunity you can possibly find. Looking back my biggest life philosophy came from my college experience, take the chance, take the leap of faith, jump in. The worst thing that will come out of it is that you learn to build your wings or your net on the way down and I have built plenty the last several years. Sometime I flew and sometimes I fell, but either way I was ready.

Over the next two and a half years I learned many of my greatest lessons, and most of them had nothing to do with Pre-Constitution Law…

I learned to know when to ask for help. This day would never have happened if it wasn’t for the incredible team behind me every step of the way. My family never stopped believing I could “do it all”, even on the days when I thought for sure my head would explode. Whether it was a pep talk, a home cooked meal, a text reminder, or simply a word of encouragement, I always had someone to lean on.

I learned that the most important thing in life is honesty. I remember sitting on the couch, the day after I won Miss Wisconsin USA, only one week into the first semester of my second year of school, and not even knowing where to start. Well I started first with a block of cheese, yum, and then proceeded to email each of my professors and the Dean of Students office saying “this just happened, and I have no idea how I’m going to make this school thing work”. That week I waffled a million times between taking a break from school or just juggling. I wanted to experience all the opportunities being Miss Wisconsin USA would afford me but I wanted to get the most from my college experience. My greatest fear was in trying to accomplish both I would ultimately fail at both and end up disappointed. I remained honest throughout the school year about my stresses, successes, and crazy ass schedule and managed to not only stay in school full time while prepping for Miss USA, but do so while maintaining a respectable GPA and with an entire campus staff cheering me on after taking my final exams two weeks early to “do the thing”! The amount of support I received from the UW-Madison community while I was at Miss USA will forever be one of the highlights of my life. Madison is a big school and people accomplish great things every day there, but for one moment in time, I was the Badger of the moment and I am so proud and so honored to have had that opportunity. It was a ‘golden drop’ if you will or should I say ‘red drop’ in the bucket.

I learned that you can’t do it all. You might have to give up being a double major or making the dean’s list and readjust your goals. For me, graduating became the focus and the perfectionist in me needed to let go of the rest. Flexibility is the key to making any plan work for you. I was great at preaching to middle school students as Miss Wisconsin USA to set a large goal and then smaller goals to get there. Sometimes that means focusing your energy in different ways. Sometimes it means letting go of a lot of other things to make it happen. One thing I am not great at, is saying no. Throughout my college experience I learned that sometimes, simply for your mental sanity, you need to say no.

I learned where my priorities lie. Even if means sleeping on a couch or driving odd hours of the day, you have to make time for the people you love and the people who love you. I also learned that distance isn’t real, I mean it is real of course, but not by meaningful relationship standards. If you are in the same room or a thousand miles away you can still love big and still be present. You can still give support and you can still seek it, regardless of the space between you.

Most importantly, I learned that everyday is a chance to learn, to make mistakes, to take chances. Nothing in life is perfect, nothing in life works out exactly how you thought it would. But if you work hard and trust the process, anything is possible. Bringing back the old saying “The sky really is the limit” I wouldn’t trade these past three and a half years for anything. Thanks to college, “found myself”, or at least was able to work on who I want to be.

I am so happy to say that I am officially one B.A. woman…Bachelor of Arts in Communications that is. So excited to begin the next series of drops….

Dream Big,
Sky

Just Life: A Letter to my 10 Year Old Self

Dear Sky,

As hard as it is to understand right now, your mom is right when she says it gets better. It doesn’t get better because people get nicer, it gets better because you become stronger.

There will always be people who tear you down because you are different or your dreams are too unique, too out of the norm or too big. You may be mocked for the things you wear or the passions that you have, people fear things that they do not know. Do not let other people’s ignorance allow you to change who you are or who you want to be.

It’s easy to fall under the influence of the “mean girls” or become a follower to avoid that feeling of being “different” or “unworthy”. Having the strength to be the one girl who advocates for your friend being bullied may not serve you well in the short term, but in the long run it will build the kind of character that will take you very far in life. Have the strength to be unapologetically yourself, the best example of this has been and will always be your little brother. The one who wore an eyepatch and pirate hat for school pictures – and who will go on to have the greatest sock collection you have ever seen. 

True friends are difficult to find. It’s okay if your greatest friend is your mom, she’s a trusty sidekick anyway. Don’t get down on yourself if you’re home alone on a Friday and not at the “cool girl” sleepover, I promise you that you’re not missing out on anything. The truest friends you will find will come later in life. They are the people that support you when you dive head first into life and often times will jump right in with you! 

Be kind. At points, this will prove to be the most difficult of any challenge you encounter. It’s easy to want to fight back, to fight hurtful words with equally as hurtful words. But what is it worth? Take the high road. When someone insists on talking ill of you, don’t do the same, prove your worth by continuing to be positive, to be kind and to be driven by your own light. People will see you for who you show them you are, not who people claim that you are. Hold true to this in every aspect of your life. *As I always told middle-schoolers this philosophy holds true on Snapchat, Facebook, Twitter and Instagram too,* remain kind in the face of negativity, don’t respond, you don’t have to.  This is always true, even when it doesn’t feel like it is. You will look back and be proud of the choices you made.

More than anything, never give up on yourself. There will be moments when you want to throw in the towel on what seem like the craziest of dreams or your future which at 10 seems like an eternity away. Set those goals high and make them happen. You will never regret working hard and getting a “no”, but you will always regret giving up and never taking the chance.

Dream Big,

Skylar

Miss Wisconsin USA Life: Farewell

Ahh, the dramatic music begins.

One woman behind me will have their life change forever. To those women and their families, I know how agonizing this waiting is, so I will try and keep this short and sweet.

To the lucky young lady that wears this crown, here are my tips:

Find your team, hold them tight, and remember you can never say thank you enough:

Thank you little brother for always being the voice that brings me down to Earth, and for easily being the best dressed person at Miss USA. Also for celebrating three birthday’s in a row at a pageant, Happy Birthday Noah!

Thank you mom and dad for letting me spread my wings, but reminding me that although the world is big I always have the most loving place (and people) to call home. Also for the reminders to WRITE IT DOWN.

Thank you to my Queen Team. My roommate and all of my amazing friends for never questioning my random schedule and always finding time to keep me sane.

To my aunt Meg, and numerous friends across the state and beyond, thank you for always giving me a place to rest my head, even if you only had a 20 minute notice. Also thank you Brynn and Eva for ALWAYS filling my sleep over nights with lots of laughs.

Bunny, thanks for doing what BFF’s do. Keep you laughing, offer words of wisdom, and helping you reach for your wildest dreams. If it wasn’t for your support of my first modeling in Dallas, I might not be standing here.

The entire crew who came out to Miss USA and made sure when the word “Wisconsin” came out of my mouth, the whole arena erupted.

Love your new sister like she is family, which she will quickly become. And if you’re really lucky you actually will gain an entire second family.

Abby, we have shared lots of laughs and lots of brunch. Thank you for always putting a smile on my face, whether it was 1,000 miles away or on what seemed like a cross country road trip. You have improved my Instagram aesthetic and made this year so memorable.

To the entire Bryson family,  I really feel like I became the fourth Bryson girl and it’s one of the greatest blessings of my year.

Be open to new ideas and stay strong physically and mentally.

It truly takes a village when it comes to your preparation for “the big show”. Find strength in yourself, and be thankful for the one who offers you even more strength…in your arm muscles…Nick you rock!

If you’re for sure going to wear Emerald Green on the Miss USA stage, try on the black dress…it may just end up being the one. Mac Duggal and Bridal Elegance made my dreams come true, in more ways than just my perfect gown.  Jan and Kathy, thank you for going above and beyond to make sure I was my best dressed AND most confident every step of the way.

Stay true to who you are.

As simple as that.

Be open to learn, you don’t know everything and if you’re willing you will learn more this year than you ever imagined.

If you think you know how to blend your makeup, just wait until you meet with Brenda. You will feel like a 5 year old with a makeup kit from Claire’s and walk out feeling like the queen of the world, or maybe just the USA!

Smile a lot.

This one may become difficult throughout the year as you face stress, hanger, and what seems like a lack of enough appearance wear. Laugh through it all, you have one year to do this and it would be no fun without a few hiccups.

After a few trips to see Dr Meiser and Wahl in Minneapolis, you will do this one without trying just to show off your perfected smile.

Soak it all in.

You will have opportunities this year that you never dreamed of, take advantage of them, even if it means skipping a few, lots of, classes. If you can find a travel buddy, even better, thank you Jessie for the greatest adventures and best breakfast tacos I’ve ever had.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help.

Dinner at Grandma and Grandpa’s is always a great way to clear your head, I am so grateful to have a support system that lives just up University Ave.

You will find so much support through this year, thank you to each of the individuals and businesses who donated to make sure I was able to do as many appearances as I hoped and have the most incredible trip to Miss USA.

Remember where you came from and how you got here.

There are countless people who helped shape you into the extraordinary woman you are today. Never forget those moments or those people.

Write it down.

It will help you remember conversations that made you cry, reflect, or laugh until it hurt. Also it’s great to look back and laugh about the time your friend drove you to a gas station so you didn’t have to use a port-a-potty at a homecoming celebration, or the time your 9 year old cousin wrote a story for her class title “when my cousin became famous”.

On that note, take pictures.

SOOOO many pictures, I recommend a backup hard drive so you can take even more than a lot.

Pictures are memories you hold on to forever, thank you Micheal and Dean for giving me some of the best memories ever, to have and cry at FOREVER.

Listen to your directors.

Denise, Craig, and Libby will become your greatest blessing this year. Their goal is to make you the best version of yourself that you can possibly be, they will do that and then some.

I will forever be grateful to be a part of the Future Productions family. Carol, Bruce, Casey Lynn and all of the volunteers your dedication to this organization does not go unnoticed and these life changing moments would not be possible without you.

This is no longer just about you.

The moment that crown goes on your head you become a representative. A representative of each woman on this stage, a group of women who will become your strength this year. A representative of an international brand, the Miss Universe Organization, how cool. And above all, a representative of the state of Wisconsin:

This can mean whatever you want it to, but do not take it lightly.

I was reminded at each middle school visit I did, that with hardwork, goal setting, and believing in who you are, any dream is possible. Crown or no crown, each woman on this stage needs to realize that the Sky really is the limit and there is no cap on how far you can go from here.

364 days, 12 flights, 70,000 miles, 90 appearances, and a heck of a good time later. I am your Miss Wisconsin USA 2017, Skylar Witte

Pageant Life: Post-Pageant Blues

Everything I write is happy, happy, positive, but guess what life isn’t always happy, happy, positive…even mine. It’s amazing but I have my days, my weeks, my months and even my years (sorry Friends fan) Every pageant girl out there has gone through the PPBs Post-Pageant Blues, sometimes it happens after a state pageant, sometimes after a biggie like Miss USA, but we all face it and if you don’t think it will happen to you prepare yourself.

I am digging myself out of it as we speak.  People will always jump to the conclusion that you are upset or sad that you didn’t win or place….always. But for most of us it has nothing to do with the outcome, it has to do with coming off of the high. Just over two months ago I was coming from this place of total mind, body and soul preparation.  Ever inch of my being was humming in perfect unison.  Not only did my butt look fantastic, but I could answer any question you threw at me from my thoughts on government funding of Planned Parenthood to my favorite flavor of ice cream, and everything in between.  PEAK pageant performance.  I had spent months investing in not clothes or make-up but in myself  in preparation for the big show.  And honestly all the time was worth the investment. I am a different person because of it!

Now on top of all of that, throw me in a place for 11 days with 50 literally amazing humans who have all been doing the same thing, who all have perfect butts and brilliant banter and you have now entered this alternative universe and that place is hard to leave. Everyone imagines Miss USA is this cut-throat, competitive experience where everyone pretends to get along but the minute interviews and prelims begin the gloves come off and the claws come out….hahaha someone actually told me that before I went. But guess what, the opposite usually happens, by the time prelims hit you have found your pageant soul mates and you cheer for each other; HONEST TO GOD.  You become completely protective of your new family, when the crowning is done and they whisk away the new queen talk turns to your wishes and hopes that she has an amazing year…then everyone stands on-stage and  the reality hits you…IT’S OVER!  Tomorrow or even that very night everyone will once again go their separate ways and you have to hope that you can reconvene at reunions, other pageants and maybe if you stumble into the state where they live. And the weeks and months pass and you miss them.

That’s phase one.

Then there is phase two….your mind goes insane….”I don’t have to do two-a-day workouts, I’m in Vegas and they have infinite pizza and buffets, when I get back to Wisconsin I’m getting Culver’s…..all of Culver’s, everything they make at Culver’s! Thank God I can stop with the hours of  FOX News and CNN coverage to try to get a full and realistic view of every single thing happening in every corner of the world. I’m shutting off for a bit, and when I’m ready I will turn back on.”

Everyone goes a little crazy after the pageant, again if you don’t think you will be this girl, prepare yourself. I have finally quelled my need to experience all of the things I had been missing, at the expense of the butt, my belly, the thighs and every other part of my body that has gone into a little bit of shock. I have started to pay attention again to the things I’m passionate about happening in the world and want to follow, everything else will be handled by a daily look at ‘The Skimm’.  Yesterday I went to the gym……I didn’t recognize the front desk attendant……uffda….it has been a long time.  I’m slowly finding my way back to me. Will she ever be the sculpted, news junkie who made her way to Miss USA, probably not?!?! But she will be a better version of who she was before this journey began and she will have some of the coolest, most insanely beautiful long-distance friends…..YEP she will and she does.

Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened……blah, blah, blah……it’s OK….YOU CAN CRY BECAUSE IT’S OVER, just know when it’s time to stop whining and get back to what’s important.

Also don’t get me wrong, I’m not actually sad, down-and-out or going through real depression….I’m loving my life. One part is over but a million other things are just beginning. I have thoroughly enjoyed hitting up the Culver’s and experiencing a million life events that could only happen after Miss USA.  But every once in a while the pangs of PPB flair up…..and there is no remedy.  It happened, it’s over……accepting it….slowly!

Dream Big, Skylar

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Just Life: Dancer Thighs

 

In the past I have addressed body image and self-confidence. Everybody out there can relate to having concerns, or being self-conscious about their body. The reality is everyone’s idea of beauty, the perfect body and what makes them feel pretty are as different as how the rest of the world perceives them. Healthy looks different on everyone, and this is something I have learned through this journey to Miss USA and as life continues post-Miss USA. My body has changed so much over the past few years and each transition has given me a new gift and a new challenge.

If you follow my writing, you know the story, I was a member of one of the best dance teams in Wisconsin (not completely bias, the team actually has the history to back up the claim) but it was not an easy road to get there. Physically I was not strong or a technically skilled dancer, so I had to work extra hard to find success. Along the way I developed my pride and joy, those dancer thighs. All my dancer friends out there know exactly what I’m talking about, off-season you lift to maintain them and in-season they are the reason you can do all those switch leaps and toe-touches (and they are reason it is crazy difficult to find jeans)! By the time I was done with High School I had beautiful dancer legs that I was so proud of.

When it came time to compete for Miss Wisconsin USA, I had a body I was proud of! Two years after dancing every day and I was still strong and I was healthy. That being said, when it came time to walk the Miss USA stage I had goals in mind and leaning out those dancer muscles was one of those goals. I switched up my exercise routine and changed what I was eating. I asked for tips from fantastic trainers and friends to help me reach my body goals, without compromising my weight or my daily consumption of cheese. I lost inches around my thighs and hips, but I maintained the weight I have had since high school. At Miss USA I had reached my goals for that point in my life, and I felt healthy and happy. Those same thighs I was proud of as a dancer I had become proud of for a whole different reason.

The point of this story is that healthy means something different for everyone, and can mean something different to an individual at different points in their life. Body image is a continuum for most women. The part you love one day can be your worst enemy the next. We think about it, we obsess, we judge ourselves even when no one else likely notices. This process never ends. If you are a dancer, a student, a weight-lifter, a mom, a bikini model the things you are most proud of might not even make sense to the rest of the world. But it isn’t their body to love, it is yours. So love your large muscular thighs, your waist, your hips, those biceps and triceps. LOVE IT ALL. The ability to change and grow with who you are at even given moment is part of the self-acceptance process.  Being body positive should change as much as your body changes.

Embrace not only what god has given to you but what you are able to create through hard-work and commitment, both are equally worth celebrating!

Dream Big,

Skylar

 

 

Miss Wisconsin USA Life: IT IS HERE

Since I was a little girl, I have watched Miss USA and admired the beautiful women who grace the stage. When I decided to compete this year for Miss Wisconsin USA I wanted nothing more than my chance to be one of those women. I wanted the opportunity to say “Wisconsin” on the big stage, and do photo shoots with talents like Fadil Berisha. I wanted to pick out the dress that would forever be archived as “the best dress I’ve ever worn” (sorry future husband). But, from the second that crown was placed on my head, it became so much more than me.

Yes, all of those things I listed are perks of the job. But for 8 months, I have had the privilege to represent the people and the state that helped make me who I am today. Throughout my journey as Miss Wisconsin USA, I have done over 70 appearances, and met thousands of people across the state. When I walked that stage Thursday and tonight, I am a representative of the proud, hard-working and spirited people of Wisconsin. Somewhere on this journey became the realization, this is bigger than me…so much bigger.

To the veterans who shared their love of god and country at one of my first appearances at the Tomahawk Fall Ride; to the band at Amery Middle School who learned “On Wisconsin” in two days just because I was visiting; and the cranberry farmer who was so honored to give me the literal fruits of his labor,  when I introduced myself and said that word “WISCONSIN”, you are my meaning behind it. It came out loudly and enthusiastically…but for good reason!

I have had a lot of people throughout this journey ask me if I would be upset if I didn’t make top 10 and tonight I will walk away with a smile and full heart no matter what the outcome. My goal was to represent the state of Wisconsin to the very best of my ability and as of today, May 14, I believe I have done that. Walking the stage wearing “Wisconsin” is enough, in fact it’s more than enough, for me. I feel blessed to be the woman chosen for this job and for this fantastic ride.

This is part of my life, it is not my whole life (although it’s been the best part so far). I will forever carry the distinction of being Miss Wisconsin USA 2017 and would be so honored to carry the title of Miss USA 2017 but even at that…neither of those titles will ultimately define my life. I have BIG plans, big hopes and big dreams and they do not end on this stage tonight. This is just the beginning. I embrace being the youngest contestant because it means not only was I lucky enough to experience the ultimate interview, ultimate stage experience so early in my life. It also means I now have 50 of the most amazing women I have ever met as my lifelong friends and inspirations. I have a big, bright and beautiful future ahead of me. I am not the underdog. I am not at a disadvantage. I am not going to be devastated by any outcome….because tonight….this is the dream. I did what I set out to do. I represented the state of Wisconsin with everything I have in me. I am the best version of me that I have ever been.

There are 51 women and not a single one among us is ‘not deserving’, not a single one among us will not make a wonderful Miss USA and a great representative at Miss Universe.

So if I don’t win what is the plan you ask…first and foremost return to the state I love and enjoy every last second of holding this title. I will finish out my undergrad degree. I am registered for summer courses and one more semester on-campus. Which brings me to the next part, continue building my modeling and acting portfolio and reel because that process has been on hold but it’s still a dream. I plan to eventually make a go of it in the entertainment  industry before someday returning to law school. Some people take a gap year, I am planning for a gap career. In the meantime I will continue to model for my favorite clients and hope to do Mac Duggal Fashion Week and New York Fashion Week again, if they will have me. I plan to spend time with my family (I miss them), maybe hang out with some babies, any babies will do. Go on dates, this isn’t an open invite but there is a boy who’s out in the world who I would love to go on a date with, he is probably reading this right now and either panicking or smiling….stay tuned. Eat cheese, copious amounts of cheese. And just flat out relax for my summer.

So cheer for me! Cheer loudly! But know that no matter what happens, I am proud and I am SO HAPPY!!IMG_7113

THANK YOU WISCONSIN!

Dream Big,

Skylar

 

 

Just Life: Grounded

Someone the other day asked me the “secret” to staying true to myself, even when the world around me is moving so quickly. Even when you are just weeks away from the ‘big show’.   I don’t know if I have a secret, but I do have some methods.

Say thank you:  This is the most important and quite frankly the easiest. Never stop saying thank you and never stop being grateful. Thank the woman who is giving you your morning coffee, something that keeps you running through the day. Thank your parents, let them know that you appreciate them and all they do for you. Thank the people who put up with your madness, my roomie Sav fits this bill. Right now I find myself thanking sponsors and my directors on almost a daily basis for giving me the opportunity of a lifetime. Never forget to say THANK YOU!

Remember the struggles: This year I have chosen to talk to middle school students, because frankly it was the most difficult and uncertain time of my life. For almost everyone it was the period in life when you lose the idealism of your elementary school days and start to realize that it is a lot harder to become Hannah Montana than one would think. All our crazy dreams start to get beat down, the awkwardness and growing pains means everyone becomes competitive, girls and boys forget how to speak to one another and support each other and all of the reality of life starts to set in. It is the time when most kids stop with the big dreams and they start to look like fairytales; unachievable and ridiculous.  Add to that literal growing-up, the braces, the bullying and in my particular case  dealing with actual life….My entire middle school experience included living with and watching my grandmother slowly lose her battle with cancer. REALITY SUCKS. Don’t forget the struggle, don’t forget how it felt when your life was less than perfect, don’t forget what made you, YOU! Embrace it because it will keep you focused on your dreams.

Set achievable goals and then make it happen: This one is near and dear to my heart. This year I did not set out to “Become Miss USA or even to walk in New York Fashion Week” two monumental goals that frankly I have no actual control over. Judges will decide if I am the right woman for the job on May 14th and a designer had to pick me from thousands of model hopefuls. But I did set achievable goals to prepare myself for these things to happen. My physical preparation is all on me. Everyday getting up, hitting the gym, eating clean, all the trainers in the world can’t make your body ready for a competition or to walk a runway… if you don’t do the work. A series of small fitness goals and a plan that is achievable and realistic. Building a modeling portfolio and network of industry professionals all done with a series of small, systematic goals. I did set a goal of being the best Miss Wisconsin USA once I was crowned. For me that meant making a lot of appearances, promoting my state, promoting my #skysthelimit philosophy to every school that would let me in the door, promoting the Miss Universe Organization and just working really hard all day, every single day for the 365 days I am fortunate enough to wear the crown and sash.  This method works for almost all big dreams. Break it down and make it happen.

Just recently I watched film of JJ Watt (NFL rock star and Wisconsinite) returning to thank his 4th grade teacher for believing in his Badger/NFL dreams.  Even in 4th grade JJ knew his end goal but to get there every day he worked on the small things, every day focused and committed. Plus, he never lost sight of the people who helped make it happen, and even at the height of his career is gracious and thankful!

Don’t let anyone else define you: The hardest of all my suggestions…really hard when you are 13-18 years old, still hard when you are an adult. I am currently putting myself in the position to be ‘judged’ by the world. The harshest kind of judgment, the kind that will come in a bikini, in front of a LOT of people. The kind that will come with such quotes from viewers at home and even online like, “Oh Wisconsin is hideous!” “Not my pick” “Hate that girl” seriously those things will be said about not just me but every contestant by someone somewhere in the world. But here is my reality….NO ONE ELSE DEFINES ME! No ones judgment of me on a single day or in a single moment will be the foundation for how I live my life or the goals I am able to accomplish. This whole experience is a drop in the bucket of my life.

My middle school visits almost always circle to this place where a sweet girl or boy connects with me afterward and talks about someone mistreating them. And we almost always have a discussion about not allowing someone to define you. No one is allowed to tell you your dreams are too big, your passions, your ability to achieve, no one knows what is in your heart and no one has the right to take what is away from you.

This is how through the craziness and through what I will likely remember as some pretty big defining moments in my life, I have never lost sight of Skylar Witte. The girl, the middle school girl uncertain, scared and sad…the woman walking the runway in New York, same person….always stay grounded in who you are.

Dream Big, Skylar

New York Fashion Week February 2017

 

 

Miss Wisconsin USA Life: Top 5

“Your Miss Wisconsin USA 2017 is Skylar Witte”

6 months ago, this one sentenced changed my life. Over the past 6 months I have grown more as a person than I could ever have imagined.

I knew going into the Miss Wisconsin USA competition that there were many things I wanted to do if I had the honor of being crowned. I didn’t realize just how many amazing opportunities having this title would afford me and just how much fun I was going to have. Every appearance I do is different and every appearance has brought the greatest memories, but I thought to commemorate this 6 month anniversary I would share my top 5 favorite memories so far.

5. When my 9 year old cousin Eva wrote a story for class titled “When My Cousin Became Famous”. Becoming a role model for so many young people across the state is an honor that I am thankful for every day, but being able to be a role model for my two sweet cousins is a cherry on top. The story was just as adorable as you would imagine, she walked her class through the whole pageant. Reliving the best moment of my life through her words was such a sweet reminder that winning this title did not just impact me, but so many of the people who love me.

4. Singing the National Anthem at WACPC State Dance. This particular appearance was special for multiple reasons. At every middle school visit I do, I share the same story about the first time I sang the National Anthem at an Altoona High School hockey game. The story ends in me forgetting the words, utter humiliation, and using all the gumption I could muster to go back the next week and try again.   I thought while in that moment I would never sing the National Anthem for an audience again. Although I have sang the anthem since, this appearance made me especially proud, I had never given up. I also was so honored to have been invited because just two years ago I had won D1 State Pom Championship with the DC Everest Dance Team in that exact same spot. To be back on the floor as a representative of the state and cheering for my team, was such a surreal feeling.

3. The UW Homecoming Parade. Being a Badger makes me so proud, and has since the day I got my acceptance email. The parade for me was extra special, it was the first time I got to meet Chancellor Blank.  It felt transcendent because she came up to me and knew who I was. After I had won she had sent me a congratulatory email. I assumed it was from some assistant and doubted the Chancellor really took the time to reach out, I was wrong! My mom got a photo of me “fan girl-ing”. Anyone who knows me, knows that me being overly excited for pretty much anything isn’t new. At this appearance I also got to see Miss Wisconsin, Courtney Pelot, who represented Wisconsin at the Miss America pageant.  I had the pleasure of meeting Courtney when she was a local title holder and remember thinking, “that girl is the next Miss Wisconsin.” I watched the whole live stream of her state pageant and definitely cried when she was crowned. Courtney is a graduate of UW Madison, so getting to catch up with her and share a love for the greatest University on earth was fantastic. Thousands of people lined my favorite street in  Wisconsin, State Street and I threw out candy while trying to choke back tears. Footage from me in the parade was on ESPN during the game. There is no way I could ever explained how honored I am to have the opportunity to be Miss Wisconsin USA and in this moment, I was so overwhelmed with gratefulness.

2. My trip to Colorado to watch the Miss Colorado USA state pageant. This particular state pageant was the first time I got to spend any long amount of time with Miss Wisconsin Teen USA, Abby Bryson, and her mom, Lisa, after our crowning. Lisa was kind enough to let me stay with them since I was coming to Colorado alone. This trip was my favorite trip ever because I realized I had gained a lifelong friend and sister. We spent the trip laughing, eating lots of breakfast food, and realizing that we had so much in common that we really should just be best friends, and that’s exactly what happened. Pageants are always talked about as a sisterhood, and I am so lucky to have not only gained a sister, but to have gained a second family.

1. My favorite memory of the past 6 months was the day that I found my gown for Miss USA. I will attempt to tell this story in a condensed version:

I have had the privilege to work with the talented Mac Duggal for just over a year, after attending an open call looking for new models.  It has been the best job a girl could ask for. When I was crowned Miss Wisconsin USA, Mac and I started talking ideas for my perfect gown. I spent months giving his team countless ideas, nothing that I thought could actually be combined into a perfect dress, it was all over the place and a little unique. Every time I was there or working for the company we would all talk a little more about it.  At one point while visiting the Mac offices I had viewed a sketch of something being worked on and was pretty excited it sure looked like it had elements of my dream gown.  When it came time to picking a gown at our pageant prep week,  I was shopping with my directors, my mom and aunt trying on all sorts of new dresses from Mac’s collection. I loved them all, but there was nothing that screamed “THIS IS THE DRESS”. A gown was pulled for me that hadn’t been on the rack when I originally walked in the room. Immediately after getting zipped I liked what I was seeing and the gown fit like nothing I had ever tried on, perfectly. As I walked out of the dressing room and saw myself in the mirror, the tears came automatically. It was the. most. perfect. gown I had ever laid eyes on. Antoinette, the design teams Pageant Coordinator had Mac on FaceTime to tell me that he had designed this dress from his new collection specifically for me, rushed a sample so it would make it to the gown selection and it was the exact vision and culmination of what I pictured myself wearing on the Miss USA stage. Cinderella moment in real life.  The color was also hand-selected and the only completely unexpected surprise from my original dream…but the color is what makes this dress work on every level and that’s why the Mac Duggal team is the best, they just know and they definitely know me and what works for my style, personality and body!!! Turns out almost everyone in the room knew what was going to happen, but our sweetest volunteer Carol wasn’t even aware she had grabbed the gown, when I started sobbing she was panicked thinking I had just fallen in love with the wrong dress. Thankfully for Carol the sneaky plan worked out even better than imagined.  It was the most extraordinary moment, and one that I will never forget. I wish we had video taped the whole crazy thing, but for those who got to live in that moment with me I’m sure no one will forget it.  I cannot wait for everyone to see this masterpiece on the Miss USA stage. I am not revealing anything more  but if I could describe my gown in two words, they would be  SIMPLE DRAMA! (yep that will get you wondering)

To say that this has been the best 6 months of my life would be an extreme understatement. I still don’t think it’s all really sunk in, but I do know that each moment I am thankful and feel so lucky to be representing this great state. Thank you everyone for your support so far, here’s to the next 6 months! Miss USA here I come.

Dream Big,

Skylar

Just Life: Being Respected

I recently had the most real conversation of my reign as Miss Wisconsin USA with two girls who must have been in the 7th or 8th grade. I was visiting a middle school to give one of my usual presentations about setting goals, living your dreams and choosing to be positive at an age where bullying just seems easier. Afterwards, in the lunch room these two bright-eyed beauties approached me and presented me a question I had never been asked…but boy, did it get me thinking.

Why is it that you are so beautiful and all the boys in our school listened to you and were so respectful of you when you were talking, they were calm and kind, no one made rude comments  but to us they are always disrespectful and sometimes just mean?

And immediately, just like that, in a split second I was thrust back to middle school myself, there is a reason I talk to this age group and this was it. Suddenly my life advice could mean something. So I sat up straight and launched into my brief but hopefully lasting rant.

I was treated the same way, most girls in middle school are! Is it right? No. Is it OK? No. Is it part of everyone growing up and learning to build friendships and relationship? YES. Is it likely a boys way of getting a girls attention? 100% YES… but do you have to accept rudeness and mockery and cruelty? NO.NEVER.NOT EVEN ONE TIME!

So I told the girls to stand-tall, be strong and never let a boys words or actions get the best of them. I explained how even though it is easy to cry, to be cruel back or to simply go and tell on a someone for being disrespectful, the best course of action you can take is to not allow it in your life. Like all things hurtful or mean, the effect of the action is only meaningful if it elicits a response that the tormentor was seeking. I shared the story of being booed once at a pep assembly by a large group of nasty boys because I had recently broken up with one of their friends. I felt like running from the gymnasium but I didn’t, I did my part with a smile on my face and simply kept going. Once a boy was a jerk to me and I didn’t speak to him for a good three years, until he grew out of this unfortunate-jerky-phase. That is not a scientific phase of puberty but I believe it exists. He came around and later apologized for all the mistreatment when we were younger.

It is hard advice…not allowing your feelings to be hurt is a nearly impossible task, but choosing to not allow someone the satisfaction of slowly beating down your self-confidence is a necessity, in middle school and well beyond.

I told them that being that strong brings with it a new set of challenges. People will call you cold, snotty and much worse. People, especially mean ones hate to be ignored. But in the end the right people (and in the case of dating, the right boy) will rise to the surface. When you are older and have gone through all of the growing pains, those boys will start to respect your strength, your conviction and your independence. They are the people you will want in your life.

Dream Big,

Skylar

 

Miss Wisconsin USA Life: The Path Pavers

One of the most overwhelming ‘truths’  of becoming Miss Wisconsin USA was the fact I was suddenly launched into the same category as some of my idols. This is not hyperbole, the 12 women in this photo (Courtesy: Pageant Update)  who have come before me are, with all sincerity,  my lifelong heroes.

I have been fortunate to follow their journeys and some I have been blessed to personally get to know. Many have impacted my own path in ways they may have never even realized…but isn’t that what a blog is for…to share your inner most thoughts. So I’m about to tell them.

Kate Redeker, your pure beauty is incomparable. When I found out you would be competing as a miss the first year I was a teen contestant I tried not to ‘fan girl’ the moment I met you. Winning your title at 19 gave me hope and courage.  Just two months later while attending the Miss Minnesota USA pageant my mother and I got into a lengthy conversation with your parents. I told them how much I wanted to become Miss Wisconsin USA but thought I should wait, worried I was too young to compete. They were so absolutely inspiring. Your mother told me I had something special and the judges would see it at any age. They are such a huge reason this was my year, they planted a seed that grew all year long.

Haley Laundrie, there is a photo of you and Bucky Badger throwing up the “W” that was my ‘goal image’. Whenever I imagined my dream, what it meant to be Miss Wisconsin USA and how I envisioned it,  I thought of you and UW-Madison and that image. Bucky and I have yet to recreate, but I’m working on it. There will be a picture of Miss Wisconsin USA 2017 with Bucky, it will happen.

Bishara, I once referred to you as the “Queen of Queens”, and it is the truth. This year I finally had the chance to meet you and learn from you. I even had the opportunity to try  on the yellow dress you wore the night you were named into the Top 10 at Miss USA (fate anyone)!

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Your mother was on a mock interview panel that day and she gave me the best piece of advice I had gotten up until that point. She asked me about my dream job and I started by talking about becoming Miss Wisconsin USA and then Miss USA but quickly apologized for sounding too over-the-top. She stopped me and said “never apologize, be strong and confident in what you want and don’t be afraid to say it out loud!” I’ve thought about that moment many times since. When I completed the Miss Wisconsin USA interview I was disappointed that the judges never asked me that question. I’ve come to the conclusion they already knew the minute I walked into the room. Strength and conviction, they knew exactly why I was there. Thanks to your beautiful Momma for reminding me it’s ok to know what you want!

Courtney we have yet to meet, however my mother and your mother have formed a unique mommy mojo that makes me laugh. Your mother has always let it be known she believed in me and she saw something in me before anyone else had quite yet noticed it. She was convinced of my fate and kept my biggest fans sane in their most insane pageant moments not one but two years in a row. She just knew, I don’t know how but she believed in me when others doubted! I have to think it is because she raised a double crown winner and astonishing human being. She once said something about me reminds her of you, there is no greater compliment in the world.

Jordan I remember meeting you at the tender age of 13 when you were helping Kenna Mia as we both enjoyed our first stage experiences…I remember being completely enamored by you and your smile. You were the most beautiful woman in the room and still are everywhere you go.

Alex Wehrley, you are living my dream by creating a successful career in the entertainment industry. Not only that, you are doing it with grace, style and remaining true to yourself the entire time. You are the woman I aspire to become. I hope we can meet in person one day, because my connection to you is strong and that’s all I can say about that. #empowerista

Caitlin, your undeniable commitment to the growth of young women is evident. You have been such a force in the Wisconsin pageant community. You and your mother are the mentors every woman hopes to find in this world. Your motivations are so clear and so genuine… to build up others. I feel like I look just a little bit like you in our reaction photos and that gives me happy chills (fate anyone)!

Finally, Melissa there are no words. You are a beacon of pure light and energy. For years I ‘just missed you’ while those around me shared your story of hope and inspiration. In the end I believe it was only fitting that we finally embraced in-person the night I was crowned. Your life, your persona, your ability to create a legacy so much larger than yourself is the stuff dreams and legends are made of. You are the real and forever Miss Wisconsin USA.

My path has been paved by each of these remarkable women and their families even those I have yet to meet and know; each laying stones of hope, guidance, inspiration and love.  I feel like I am somehow the end product of each of their time with the crown. I followed their each and every move, dreaming of my moment, while working hard to create my own destiny. I can only hope that some Miss Wisconsin USA hopeful is reading this right now and someday feels the same way about me! And whoever she may be, it is just as spectacular as you have imagined it in your dreams.

Dream Big, Skylar

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